Inscriptions

It has been close to a week since I wrote anything and I am not proud of it. The words seem to evade me and honestly I don't know what to write about these days. With great difficulty I have forced myself to write this post. I suddenly seemed to have fallen into this space where I am beginning to doubt my writing skills. Just last month I was so confident about everything and was riding on a high, but of-late I feel too lost and confused filled with self doubt and it is not a great place to be in.  Few days back I had a talk with my therapist, I was telling her about how I am learning to more compassionate towards myself something I found so hard to do earlier on. It began as a very unconscious process, I began treating  myself the way I wanted to be treated as opposed to how I have been treated always. I don't think I am completely there yet but I know I am going in that direction little by little. To be honest it hasn't been very easy to do that, because all our lives we ...

Last night I watched Bulbbul, the movie on Netflix that everyone is talking about. A friend recommended it to me, I was skeptical about watching the movie after seeing the trailer but I watched it anyway. here is my review of the Movie.  To start with, the movie was good on the visuals, the costumes, the settings, the use of colours and great performances by the actresses especially. I thought the background score was good too. I see how the movie can be a bit cathartic for women who feel suffocated by the systemic oppression on patriarchy in everyday lives.  But overall, Bulbbul fails to impress, it is a one time watch, not something you can go back to where you feel connected to the characters.  The plot was predictable from the beginning and honestly it does a pretty shoddy job in storytelling. The movie touches upon subjects like child marriage, rape, enforced widowhood, physical violence on women and the subtle manner in which the women are bound by chains, both the ...

Somedays words just flow like a river and some days it is a freaking desert looking to the sky for a few drops of water. one of the most challenging part of writing is to keep the content fresh and avoiding repeating the same thing again. Good writing is when you are able to write the same thing in a way that doesn't seem like the same thing. I hope someday I can master that skill, most days my thoughts are repetitive and each time I have trouble writing I seem to start with the same thing over and over again, but that just makes it boring both to write and to read, hence the need to be able to write better and more creatively. Perhaps I should take it as a good thing as it probably will help in sharpening my writing skills.  Yesterday I wrote about something very personal and something very traumatic, I almost cried writing about it. I showed it to my sister and she too cried reading it, I felt bad that she cried but at the same time it was reassuring that my writing was able to e...

I had to take a short break from writing as I had to move, so packing, traveling and unpacking was what the past three days have been. Still have more things to unpack and settle, but I didn't want to risk not being able to write and have a lot of things in store for today to complete. Found myself a new spot to sit and write (for the time being maybe, I am going to see how this works out and change it later if necessary).  Last month I was brimming with ideas to write but this month I feel like a dried up lake. Ok let me not paint such a pessimistic picture, it isn't as bad as that, trouble is I am not able to translate my ideas into words. I know the things I want to write about, I know the stories I want to write, yet the words seem so elusive to me and it is truly sucking the spirit out of me. My writing companion for today is Billie Eilish singing bury a friend. I cannot explain what it is but somehow listening to her music helps me to write or at least it did last month. ...

This morning I was reading '21 Lessons for the 21st century' by Yuval Noah Harari, I have read parts of it earlier but never read the full book and felt it was a good time to read it. So far the reading list has had two fiction novels, so felt it was time to turn towards non-fiction for a change. even though it is a pleasant read, it still went a bit slow, hopefully that improves tomorrow. While reading it, there were so many ideas and thoughts that kept constantly popping up in my head. Perhaps it would've been a good idea to write them down then itself, but didn't want to risk putting the book down at that moment and lose interest in it so I continued reading it.  Anyway the first chapter talks about the fight between Fascism, Communism and Liberalism and how the various events in history have shaped the views of the global population in opting for them. He talks about how Liberalism emerged as the option eventually and also about how in the current era which he refer...

The past few days have been difficult, both physically and mentally and I fell short on all my targets, deadlines and tasks. It had been really exhausting and the one feeling I seem to constantly have is that of being drained out both physically and mentally. So to try and recover I did what I do best, binge watch my favourite feel good TV series, till it almost gets over or till the point I cannot watch it. Well I cannot say that I have fully recovered, but I certainly do hope being able to write something once again is a definite step in that direction. In what appears to be an involuntary function of my being I once again find myself sitting in my spot typing away to glory while listening to the Outlander theme music, only this time I am having lemon tang instead of my usual coffee. It felt like the right thing to switch to lemon tang this one time considering the constant feeling of dehydration and drained.  Last month I had made so much progress, I was writing and reading but ...